Early in the morning.

Well today is 30/12/2012.  Which is one day left before new year.  It's actually my brother's birthday.  Yes today is his 35th birthday and not yet married.  So hopefully he'll find a girl that will make him happy.  Let's hope so.

New year is coming.  I just want to end this year being a happy person.  But,  my life is not as easy as making omelette (just using my crazy words).  Hm. it is not easy being me.  Nobody know how it's feel.  I just hope it will be better soon.

Actually I have so many reason that will make me unhappy.  More I think about it, more I became unhappy. I wish i could trow it away from my mind, but it is not that simple.  Well, I tried. but failed. and now I'm still trying to battle with my self.  I found a quote says that 'The worst battle is between what you know and what you feel'.  Yes it is.  I agree with this quote.  What I feel and what I know is something that I really don't want to think right now.  That's making me unhappy  but I need to settled this down.

I just want to be happy.  Is that something wrong with it?  I don't think so.  Maybe I'm wrong.  I already did something out of my mind.  People say, just go for it.  So I listen to them.  I go for it.  At the end I'm suffer with my own decision.  Now I'm thinking that not everyone is lucky enough to get what they want.  I know I am not good. I am not well behave.  I am not like others.  but I have rights to get a chance.  and it is never happen.  Cruel....! huhu.  I do feel sad about it.  Right now, I'm done with it.  I don't want to think about it.  People says that the secret of being happy is accepting where you are in life and making the most out of every day.  So I will try my best to be happy.

So many things happened to me this year.  Well, everything happens for a reason. Every person we meet will have a role in our lives, be it big or small.  Some will hurt, betray, and make us cry, to become stronger.  Some will teach us lessons, not to change us, but for us to realize our mistakes, and to help us grow, and make us a better person.  And some would simply inspire and love us, to make us happy.  I learned a lot.

One more thing that I've learned.  Not everything will go as you expected in your life. This is why you need to drop expectations, and go with the flow of life.